Change has always invigorated me. Training wheels to two-wheelers. Passenger to driver. Suburbia to city. Broken to redeemed. I am who I am because of the change God has placed in my life. Without last summer, I would not be impregnated with a passion for politics. If I had not lobbied against child soldiery in northern Uganda, I would never have known Christ’s calling on my life. Devoid of Christian High School, I would not have the beautiful friends and mentors I have today. If change has been such a positive element in my life, why has it become my biggest fear?
For the past year, all I have wanted to do is move out, head off to college, and experience change. Moody Bible Institute. New friends. Chicago. A completely alternative lifestyle. But now, as I prepare to spend the entire summer in California and with less than 100 days left until I move to Chicago, all I want to do is cling to today. I don’t want to leave my family, high school, church, or friends. Life is so comfortable. I want things to stay the same, unchanged.
I’ve always thought it important to embrace faith- to allow God to write my life story and mold me into me. But recently, I haven’t trusted God the way I should. I’VE been making the calls in my life. I haven’t been surrendering. I haven’t let Him be everything. So Jesus, as hard as this is for me, I give you my future. I completely trust that You are going to make something out of my life and use me to further your Kingdom. I believe you’ll use San Francisco and Chicago to grow me. I know Your unrelenting love is going to see me through. It always has…
So go ahead. CHANGE ME!
